Well its the end of the semester and as is typically habit for me, I find myself lying in bed, evaded by sleep and with words in my head that don’t quite want to write themselves. I have been feeling the need to reflect over the past few weeks, but every time I have had the time to try the words didn’t come to me. I don’t know if this is due to lack of inspiration or due to the fact that reflecting on my college career forces me to acknowledge the fact that my college career is rapidly coming to a close. I need one convocation credit (which I will get tomorrow morning), to write 2 short papers, to take one test, and to pass four exams and then I will have earned the right to walk across the stage in the Pete Hanna Arena at 10:00 a.m. on May 16, 2009.
They say time flies when you are having fun. Well, my college experience has been filled with fun, good times and bad, success and failure, growth and regression but time has most definetely flown. I vividly remember the summer before I left for Samford. I remember Kate’s goodbye party and saying goodbye to someone who had become one of my closest friends and not knowing what thousands of miles and completely different lifestyles would do for our friendship. I remember spending a week at the beach with Alexis and the deepening of a friendship that is still so close to my heart today. I remember helping move James into his dorm in Tuscaloosa and crying the whole way back to Birmingham. I remember beach trips. six flags excursions, long days by the pool, laser tag tournaments and sitting around killing time with friends, none of us knowing where exactly the next four years of our life would lead.
I moved into Samford on a hot August afternoon and was filled with nervous anticipation. I have never been one to accept change easily and the thought of starting in a new place without the comforts of home and high school terrified me. I remember each of these experiences as if they happened yesterday and it is with a sense of nostalgia that I approach my upcoming graduation from Samford University.
I take comfort in knowing that true friends stick around. Miles, changes, growth and chaos aren’t enough to separate you from the friends who hold a part of your heart. My high school friends are still around and I know my college friends will be as well. I also find peace in knowing that life usually unravels as it should. College has taught me to be open to whatever road may show up along my path. I started Samford a Journalism major. I finish a Communication Studies major and a Philosophy Minor and I am not neglecting to acknowledge the stints I had in Public Relations, Sports Medicine and Dentistry along my way. I graduate knowing I chose a major that accentuated my strengths and strengthend my weaknesses. I found myself in what I enjoy.
During my time at Samford, I have seen myself grow and struggle. I am no longer the timid, shy freshman I was. College has been hard. I have had positive experiences where I experienced true joy and happiness, but there have also been dark days when it took everything I had in me to get out of bed. Enjoy the happy times. Embrace life when it is good. Keep going when life is hard. Make yourself get out of bed. When something bad happens, give yourself three days to mull over it, and then move on to the best of your ability. Time always heals. Don’t ever stop living your life. I learned lessons I wanted to learn and had lessons forced upon me that I probably at the time would have chosen not to learn, but I am better for each of them.
I experienced the loss of a friend, a true friend. I still struggle with Katie’s death, but I am so thankful for the time we spent as friends and the memories I have. You can find true joy in remembering. I think of Katie and the car rides, football games, door decorating, sorority parties and time spent together and smile. I think of her often and miss of her more, but I continue to live my life, just as I know she would have wanted me to. Death is never an easy thing to accept. Death is never easy to deal with, but we must go on. Through our lives we can honor the life of the one we lost. Life is temporary. Love with all your soul. Live with all of your heart. Make the most of every moment, you never know when your time will run out.
I’m leaving college with no regrets. I feel as if I have made the most of my college experience. I spent three and a half wonderful years at Samford and an amazing semester in Washington DC. The hard times and the easy ones have made me stronger. I have learned how to think for myself. I know what I believe and I know why I believe it. I appreciate different opinions. I love to learn. So many people have invested in my life during my undergrad career and I can’t even begin to describe the impact friends, mentors, professors and my family have had on my life. The people who have poured into me, cared about me, loved me when I didn’t love myself, called me out and pushed me harder are the ones who helped me become who I am today, and I will forever be indebted to each of them.
I find myself walking around with a perpetual lump in my throat these days. For a while I thought it was because I was sad my time at Samford was coming to an end, which I am. Samford has been good to me and I really am sad to see this phase of my life come to a close. However, I think more than the lump comes from me being sad, it comes from me being thankful of all the blessings and joy I have had during these past four years. Before I started Samford, I could never have imagined the happiness and satisfaction I would find in life during my college experience. I graduate knowing the relationships I have formed during these last 4 years will last, and I think rather the lump comes from being glad it happened, thankful it happened and anticipating that it will happen again as I start law school in the fall and see where my future takes me from there.
